04 February, 2014

RELATIONSHIPS - Are our expectations too high?

Ever since I was a little girl I was hooked on a good old rom com and I still am to this day. Even though I can now predict the ending within the first 10 minutes, you know I'm still gonna be engrossed in that bad boy right until the credits.

Rom coms teach you 2 things. One - anyone can find true love and two - that 'true love' is the most perfect thing in the world.


Unfortunately, scepticism and a string of failed relationships under my belt can tell you that isn't true. Sure, at the beginning of the relationship it's all flowers, flutters and romantic rendezvous but two years down the line it will be all slouchy clothing, farts and bottom lines.

By bottom lines I mean all the things you've found out about them over the years that you either don't quite agree with or simply just can't change. This could be their point of view on politics, how they act in social situations or something as trivial as not doing the washing up.

The media portrays the image of the 'perfect partner' as someone that is at least two of the following:

- Attractive
- Fit/Toned
- Successful
- Intellectual
- Funny/GSOH

But what about if you happen to meet a hilarious guy with a dead end job? Or a total hotty with nothing between the ears? Or a successful business man who just happens to be a little bit fat? Should we hold off and wait for something better?

Take the funny guy for example, the instant reaction for most people would be to avoid this person because he won't be able to provide a future for you and your unborn babies. But who's to say that this funny guy isn't the most kind and caring individual you've ever met. Who's also to say that laughter and happiness isn't as important as mortgages and stability?

I'd take someone who could bring light into my life every day rather than a fancy schmancy (yes, it is a word) job any day. The fact that we are so caught up in all of this in this idea of the perfect person makes me feel uncomfortable. Don't get me wrong, I do believe in the 'honeymoon period'. Obviously. Anyone repeatedly having hot sex with a new person who makes you feel amazing is going to be on cloud nine for a while but it's the stuff that follows after that that is the bit that cements what you've got. It's that bit that's going to keep you warm at night and hold your hand when you are poorly. It's that bit that is going to listen to you go on and on and on about how much you wish you could sing/dance/play the piano and most importantly it's that bit that cements your whole entire future.

My point about this whole entire ramble (if you haven't got their already) is that yes rom coms are great. But you will never come across 'real' things in rom coms. They will never shoot a scene with the dream man declaring his undying love whilst they play their playstation in their pants. It just doesn't quite get the juices flowing does it?

It's entertainment, not real life and you shouldn't let these stereotypes affect your decisions in life. Nor should you let them determine your feelings towards a person.

Do you think our expectations for a partner are too high nowadays?

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